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ocfanatic25
Thursday
Just found out Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey are getting a divorce. Tears, any divorce is sad, you hope that any marriage especially one that wasn't all about the publicity would survive. Luckily no kids involved.
Eric was stupid this morning, telling my mom he wanted to bring the shelf he made over to my dad's and lets just say she went on and on and on about how we don't respect her. She told us to go live with my dad and should have said okay to that but I just froze. I hate the holidays. But things are a little better now that I am at my dad's.
My mom keeps bringing up the poems of mine that she read, I wish she would stop. Both my mom and dad are like machines that when it comes to what Eric adn I have said they remember everything, my dad cannot remember things from his childhood but of his adulthood it is like an obsession. My mom too, with the poems she keeps like quoting things I wrote.
It is like when we were on our way to church two weekends ago and she accused me of not being able to give a little of myself which is the foundations of relationships with people so I would never marry or have a healthy relationship. It was the biggest load of crap, I am fine giving pieces of who I am away to people, I really don't have trust issues, sometimes I think I am to trustworthy telling details of my life in here for people to read, I only have them with her because it comes back to bite me in the ass.
I have never wanted my parents to remarry they are to most uncapatable people but I am realising constantly that things can never change or go back to the way they were, that is why seeing Jamie or Alex or old friends is pointless. I can see why people choose to not go to reunions. The past is in the past. If you cheat on someone and you try to make it work again, you can pretend very well and fool yourself that everything is normal and the same, but in the back of your head will always be the lack of trust. Things can never be what they once were. It is scary, one mistake, one slip up and everything can come crashing down.

Wednesday
Got home, mom and I ran errands, and we made Christmas gifts, argued over my music, and when to see Pride and Prejudice. Saw the movie at 6:50 and it was so good. I loved it. I want a dress for prom like the one Kiera Knightely wears in one scene of the movie, it was elegant but simple in white. There are two scenes in the movie were you literally feel like you heart is being ripped out and stepped on. I love romantic dramas or comedies because the template is usually the same, there is a falling out before ending up happily ever after. I told my mom to "shut up" during the movie because she kept saying she was cold and there was nothing I could do about that. That did not go voer well. VM before bed, the last thirty minutes. Eric went to Billy's birthday party and had fun.

Tuesday
Last full day before break. Yeah. Turned in English paper a little antsy about that. AP assignment I can already tell is going to be overwhelming my weekend. Watched the tape of shows Lauren taped for me. GG wasn't on there. Watched GG and House. Wow, House was good. For the first time in forever I didn't hate Cameron. House had some good lines. Didn't really see my dad.

Monday
Model UN Meeting at Dondero. 7th Heaven. Related. What a good show, I mean seriously, the sisters were cast so well, and the problems are spot on, I know the competition between sisters well from Lynn's kids.

Sunday
Church. Pretty late but dad said that shouldn't matter, we at least came. Eric had a soccer game at like 11:45 and his next game was at 7:45 so we hung out in Novi all day shopping for Christmas gifts for the family. Dad got a little pissy towards the end of the night and Eric and I think it is because of his frustrations over Lynn's behavior, it always is. Grey's Anatomy.

Saturday
Raking leaves for hours. We hung out and slept aroudn the house for like four hours and I was expecting my dad to get mad but he didn't. Ate Chinese and started "painting" with lights at 8. Saw Emily and Katherine at Blockbuster. On the computer.

Friday
Went and saw Harry Potter, freaking a little that we weren't going to make it an hour early but even though we did show up an hour early we were at the far end of the line, the line ended up going outside, but all 7 of us got to sit next to each other. I loved it!!! Everything, sure there were major changes but I didn't miss to many of the things they changed, the movie really started rolling once the Yule Ball came in. I loved all that stuff. The most heartfelt scene to me was when Hermione screamed at Ron to ask her to the dance first next time, it didn't hurt that Rupert Grint looked pretty hot. When I got home I read my favorite parts of the 6th book. Bed.
 
 
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: Crazy, Alanis Morisette
 
 
ocfanatic25
Thurday
Chem stuff is kind of pissing me off. Harry in one day. Lynn's Birthday party tonight, we are going out for dinner. Lauren, being the best friend in the whole world, is taping my shows, OC and Reunion. Sarah Drew, my clone, is leaving Everwood, but haha she didn't. Theresa and I bonded over dinner, we are getting along so well lately. Just like Lauren and I we are planning a vacation to Chicago, it will probably never happen but we can always hope. Tickets are cheap. Only three and half days till Thanksgiving Break.
Talan is marrying Kimberly Stewart and they have only been dating two months and are quote "having fun." What is it with Hollywood? Marriage is not fun it is a constant battle. Sure you want to be able to have fun and trust and all that shit but celebrities seem to think marriage is easy, when it is really the opposite no matter how good of a couple you are.

Wednesday
Good day. Had proof don't like HIM. I haven't mentioned him in so long. Dad got tickets for Harry Potter. One Tree Hill. Tyler Hilton is so good at playing an asshole. Veronica Mars. Good scenes between Logan/Veronica. I think Duncan cheated adn hoping that L/V will get back together. Saw Grounded For Life episode with Adam Brody! I love that show because of Brett Harrison. Just love him. And watched the Laguna Beach finale and I just loved it, I used to hate Kristen and still kind of do but hear feelings totally mirror mine. I can't wait for graduation adn there is a part of me that wants to go away and meet new people and room with new people, but there is the other part holding onto these friendships I have now that I never want to end.
Want to know what I like about Hilarie Burton, Jason Dohring, Kristen Bell, Brett Harrison, and Sarah Drew is that they look like normal people you would see in your high school. Not overly gorgeous or handsome just regular.

Tuesday
At Dondero at 3. We stopped for chips and stuff which made Rayna just love us. Worked for a little bit and Mr. Chiznell had a Bright Eyes cd, but from 4:30 till 7:30 we sat around and just hung out with everyone. I love everyone in Model UN, the dinner at Coney Island was a lot of fun too. Bailey is really nice and Zach, Erika, and Rayna. I was laughing so hard when Rayna was driving us to Coney and her car was going through huge puddles. Lauren's mom and my mom our letting us do UMMUN. Got home at 9 in time to miss GG but watch House. House was good as usual and stayed up doing hw.

Monday
Okay day. Don't really remember a lot. Had Model UN meeting at Kimball and Lauren and I just had fun. Mr. Robbins said he would kick my ass if I didn't sign up for UMMUN because somehow he knew that my being insecure was stopping me from signing up. Went home watched 7th Heaven and Related while doing homework.
On Related there was this whole story line about mom's and daughter's and what is really fucked up is that my mom almost died of breast cancer and I can hate her but if I have daydreams about my dad dieing I can almost cry on the spot.

Sunday
Woke up early again because everyone being so loud. Took shower and just had a slow morning. Granny came over aorund 1 for Jim's Birthday. My mom actually brought up the poem thing today and every chance I got I was sarcastic and mean to her. It was great! I kept putting her on the spot. My aunt and cousin stopped by and they are just fun, I remember a couple months ago when I looked upset and they took me out with them and asked what was wrong, just nice people. Went to church at 6 on the ride there my mom and I started yelling at each other and I ended up crying and Eric and her were laughing at me, so I slammed the church door and I just cried in the pew, felt stupid but I don't know. Got home and Lauren called and I was more than happy to go over and I helped her do the Model UN exceptance letter while we watched Desperate Housewives. Mrs.Sutherland took me home, took 4 minutes shower and then watched Grey's Anatomy. Good episode. I love that show.

Saturday
To my dad's for a couple hours. 12-4. Raked leaves, Eric can say he did more but I did. And got Ronald Reagan quotes. Went back to mom's and started typing my paper. Had five minutes to change before Lauren picked us up. Zach's party was fun, I thought his house was nice, he had big dogs though, Lauren knows how I feel about big dogs. And watched Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. Home. Bed.

Friday
Got to see Sean for about ten minutes when he drove Lauren and I to Dondero, and we stayed at the meeting for like an hour. I got in the car when my mom picked me up and hardly talked to her. The silent treatment didn't last long but she pretended like she did nothing, not a word about breaking into my stuff. Joseph was really good, our seats ended up being in back but Lauren sent my mom to sit with her mom so Lauren and I sat next to each other. Kate, Elise, and Ross all did good. Elise was in the play as a wife. Kate on guitar in pit, and Ross did sound. We went out to Big Boy after and just had a blast, at least Lauren and I did, we always have fun though. Bed.
 
 
Current Mood: contentcontent
Current Music: Wonderful, Everclear
 
 
ocfanatic25
Thursday
My day was actually going really well until about two minutes ago. I AM SO PISSED RIGHT NOW. I am venting right now with Lauren but I just cannot believe it. I am so angry that I feel like throwing something or breaking down and crying. I have that feeling in my throat and stomach like my stomach is caving in on itself. So the problem is my mom just called and she said she was on the computer and she was going threw stuff to throw away and my files are labeled POEMS, obviously mine, but she felt inclined to read them, a blatant invasion of privacy. She said that I seemed lonely, focused on death and cancer, and "Are your poems based on what you feel?" Of course they are I mean I pull things from my imagination adn life but I CANNOT believe her. She read ALL of them and asked me if I was keeping any secrets. OF COURSE I got defensive who wouldn't and she said that it is HER computer adn they were on HER computer. I never want to be like her and think that everything I bought my child is really mine. She sucks and is a really bad mom at times. I love her but I just cannot believe her. I told her this is why I don't share my life with her because she snoops, she has no right to. I am seriously just fuming. Its like when parents read there kids diaries because they are lying out in the open and they say to defend themselves, "They were just in the open" but you MAKE A CHOICE and she made the wrong one. The reason I got defensive is because most are crappy and personal because they are about the divorce or other things. I don't feel the need to be frank with her all the time. She still wouldn't know about my first kiss if it wasn't for her going through something I wrote. I just CANNOT believe her. I bet she already has called the whole family and told my stepdad about them and all this shit. I just don't understand her. I can't tell my dad because he will say this is further proof I should live with him, it is insantive. She has so little faith in me, I feel like I am under a microscope always under suspition. I don't do drugs, sneak out, have sex, nothing. She can never say my poems are good, she is just accusatory and I am tired. I am tired of it all, the constant game. I am hurt, angry, alone, sad. It all. Hint of good news, Connor has a 106 fever so we are spending the nights at my dad's so confrontation about poems saved til tomorrow. OC and Reunion on.

Why do you feel the need to invade my privacy?
You feel it is your right,
But really it is just an excuse,
You knew what you were doing,
But you chose to do it anyone,
Not thinking of the hurt you would cause,
I shake violently as you tell me what you did,
You have an innocent air,
I have the overwhelming wish to punch your face in,
I do nothing wrong,
What did I do to bring this on?
Please tell me,
You stand there thinking up answers,
But nothing,
That’s right – nothing,
I am the child others wish for,
But you have to find problems,
Or make them yourselves,
Craving confrontation,
Is what you are best at.

Wednesday
Came home from school, my day wasn't so great and then my mom says "So were going to that sex ed conference at Dondero tonight." I was like, "What the fuck?" She said that she mentioned it but seriously wouldn't you remember something like that? I definetly would. So I brought on the tears and told her about my Chem test and she dropped it. Went to Border's. Studied for Chem and did math hw. One Tree Hill and Veronica Mars. End of Veronica was funny with Logan lying on the couch, i had a feeling it was him.

Tuesday
So I we get to the banquet and I am literally shaking. My hands quiver when I pick objects up, and I could barely put one foot in front of the other. Sentences just stopped midsentence, I was a total spaz. The varsity coach spent literally five minutes per player, there are 21 total. I was just sitting a dazing off. Mock awards were pretty funny. Pat had a funny one. Got home in time to watch final 30 minutes of House. Dad complained before bed and he spent like 30 minutes discussing how the soccer thing frustrates him. I hate when he does that. It is so stupid he acts like he needs "context" or something to understand why Eric didn't make varsity. Its like "Way to make him feel like a complete failure."
 
 
Current Mood: pissed offpissed off
Current Music: Bowl of Oranges, Bright Eyes
 
 
ocfanatic25
Tuesday
Finally the day of Jess' return to Gilmore Girls but I won't be able to watch it, LAUREN PLEASE TAPE FOR ME. Been doing Economics assignments all day and reworking the english draft. Eric's soccer banquet later tonight. Not really looking forward to that. House is on tonight too. Day has gone by way to fast. Woke up at 7 this morning to be to dad's by 8.

Monday
AP test and I think I did bad on the essay. M.C. I feel pretty good about. The day was good but not as good as others. Just glad I don't have Chemistry tomorrow. Model UN meeting at Dondero. Went to Wendy's with Dominic, Sam, and Matt. Mom dropped me off at Lauren's with her and we just hung out. What is weird about Lauren's and I relationship as best friends is that we can have just as much fun saying nothing as we do when sit around complaing and sharing secrets. Last night both of us were kind of caught up in our own things but I had fun. Watched end of Related when got home and Laguna Beach. Jason can be the biggest asshole, personally I think the only reason he is good at apologizing is because he must write down movie lines to learn the skills of getting taken back.

Sunday
Woke up around 8 and went to 9 mass. When church was over we quickly made our way over to lynm's mothers house to get Theresa. We went to the Total Soccer in Wixom and watched the first half of his soccer game then left to drop off Theresa at her job. They lost the game 8-5. Didn't anyone else notice how strong the wind was? Went to the Franklin Coder mill and got donuts, cider, cheese, and sausage. My dad's cup blew away when he was trying to pour cider and it almost spilled on the digital camera. I couldn't stop laughing for five minutes and even then every so often i would burst into a fit of giggles. Went home and did AP Gov definitions. Went out to Somerset and bought the crushed velvet green military/marching band jacket!! I am in love with it. Went home and remembered had to write English rough draft. Studied for AP test tomorrow but not that well. Distracted by Extreme Makeover were this cute girl who had a what i think was burn scars all over her face, got a room with over 1400 books it was like a library and on the cieling it said, "Don't judge a book by it's cover." I was on the verge of tears, biting them back. Grey's Anatomy was incredible. Alex's speech,"For a kiss to be really good, you want it to mean something. You want it to be with someone you can't get outta you head, so that when your lips finally touch, you can feel it everywhere. A kiss so hot, so deep, you never wanna come up for air." was really thoughtfelt. I loved the kiss at the end and just everything. The alledged pregnant man, George's behavior and when Baily told McDreamy to stop bothering Meredith. The line about her being a trainwreck and people slowling to see the wreckage was just beautiful writing. The writers do such a wonderful job. I hope to one day have the ability to write as well as they do.
 
 
Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Current Music: Stand By Me (Acoustic), Oasis
 
 
ocfanatic25
Saturday
Slept in till 10. We ran errands at Kohl's, Target, Dunham's, and Home Depot. Cleaned my room and it is so nice and by tomorrow a huge pile of clothes will be on the floor. Fell in love with these Miss Sixty Leather Dark Brown boots that are $250. I am going to be saving my money up for those!! Talked to Lauren! Went to see Chicken Little which was suprsingly really funny. I didn't want it to end. Weatherman, Elizabethtown and In Her Shoes were all sold out. Went out to eat dessert next to the movie theater at Chammp's which we always do. While we were there some things bothered me, well they always do but today I am going to discuss them in detail.
I don't talk much about my dad's girlfriend of six years much. She has a million little things that she does that really annoy me and one of them is that she can be really ignorant and niave about the world. So uneducated even though she has her masters and blah blah. I like her but tonight she wasn't understanding that people in China to this day are opressed they don't have much freedom. She wants to believe they do. It just boggles my mind sometimes. Sometimes the talk can be great like when Theresa and I just talk and Lynn will just chime in or laugh along with us but then we get into these "discussions" and it happens everytime we all hang out and it ends up getting the tension to rise because my dad has to become this like "History Channel reporter type" and Lynn is like this uninformed citizen. Sometimes her priorities can be pretty fucked up. She weighs a hundred pounds but wants to lose more and she talks about and it seems is proud of her anorexia stint in college. I love her and have gotten used to her and it breaks my heart whenever they break up but I just can't stand her sometimes.
Found out Rachel's ex will be hanging around us this Christmas when her new boyfriend comes here for Christmas. Juicy! Theresa and I got along really well tonight, we pretty much agree on everything. The freshman at Mercy are supposedly just like the freshman at our school. What happened to that generation?

Friday
School was fine. I was having a good day but not as good as the day before. Came home and once again my dad was home when we got there. Rented Bewitched and Kingdom of Heaven and just chilled with my family. Bewitched wasn't as bad as critics said. Nicole Kidman has become really versitile. I tried not to think about how I wasn't hanging out with my friends. On computer till 1:30 reading fanfic. I haven't done that in soooo long.
 
 
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: The Christmas Song - The Raveonettes (Listening to OC Mix 3)
 
 
 
ocfanatic25
Thursday
Had a good day. English is becoming stupid. Warren is ruining my favorite class. Art finished project Mr. Powers said it was good. Mr.Robbins in economics talked about how when you become a teacher for middle school age boys you are told not to ask them to come up to the board because they can get erections for no apparent reason and that could be embarassing and it was so funny. Everyone was laughing for a really long time over that. Seriously in that class we get so off topic.
Just talked to Alex Hill she went to my elementary school and whenever we talk we ask how things are going and what is new and the thing is I can't be honest with her because she doesn't know about anyone who has been apart of my life the last five years who didn't go to Parker. She doesn't know about my parents and the problems they cause or Nick and how I am happy I am getting over him. It is all foriegn to her just like her life is to me. I used to be like her best friend and likewise and now I have no idea what she looks like.
The OC was on tonight and Ryan had the perfectly cheesy line, not to over the top, "I don't know what my future is, but I know you're in it." (Not exact words.) Seth's reaction was brilliant. I just think that the third season is off to a good start. Second was good but the whole Marissa is a lebian storyline sucked.
Reunion is becoming a new fav show or I guess a "must watch", Everwood hasn't been a "must" recenetly though I did watch some last night, but anyway Carla (Chyler who plays her is probably the best actress on the show) and Aaron (he is cute in a geeky way) had sex. And the cute, teenage girl fantasy came true for her, she has a crush on like her best guy friend for years, and it was prefect and since he was a geek once he knows how special it was that Carla gave her first time to him. I liked it. Cute moments. Will and Sam have a really good storyline developing. I will probably be wrong but I think Sam died because all the episodes are really focused around her. The reason I like Carla is because I am a lot like her, and I can see myself being like her in the future. She knows the path she wants but is to afraid to take it. I can be like that. And she can hold on to something for a really long time like a crush without the other reciprocating the feelings. Also she is loyal to her friends and wants things to be simpler and not so complicated. She wants them all to stay friends forever even though it seems unimaginable.
With dad tonight and except for going out to dinner and getting the amazing basil pesto pizza he mostly slept.

Wednesday
Reruns of almost everything on tv. Had good nap after school. Rosa Parks funeral. Chem causing me problems. Getting ideas for Kate and I's creation.

Tuesday
Rerun of Gilmore Girls. Watched House and it was seriously amazing. I have missed it. At mom's because dad in Boston. Ted Leo mix Zach made me listening to. "I'm A Ghost" I like. I like the one line and more but this one, "Why did you not talk to me?

Monday - Happy Halloween
Skipped Model UN meeting, Lauren's getting ready. Kate's at like 6. Went trick or treating with Mark, Rob, Casey, Kate, Paul, Lauren, Sean, Eric, Emily and Liz. This one woman said "You look like someone on tv to me..." and she meant Sarah Drew who is on Everwood and Elise tells me that all the time. Back to Kate's and Libby, Amanda, Alex, Michelle, Billy, Travis and Jamie came over to hang out. Mark, Rob, Kate, Alex, Michelle and I bonded, I guess you could say. Got home at 11.

Sunday
With my dad during the day. Went to Nordstroms and got some clothes for Christmas. I am seriously in love with them. We are going back for the Military Crushed Velvet Forest Green jacket. Then as we were walking through the mall I saw Urban Outfitters adn it was like there was a Hallelujah chorus being sung and light coming from it. Cleaned and then went home around 6. Grey's Anatomy was so good. Feeling bad for Alex, loving George, thinking Derek is an ass, and close to tears over the woman adn man with a pole through bodies.

Saturday
Mom woke me up. Went shopping with her during the day, got cute shrug for $10 and it was originally $100. I like it. Went to Lauren's at night again. Same group minus Libby and Amanda and adding Billy and Emily Reed. Fun again.

Friday
Went to Lauren's at like 6 with Eric and hung out till everyone came over around 8-9. Stayed till midnight. We hung out and dressed up in Halloween costumes. Libby, Amanda, Travis, Zach, Kate, and Eric was the gang there.
 
 
Current Mood: goodgood
Current Music: Wonderful, Everclear
 
 
ocfanatic25
Thursday
Model UN Meeting after school from 3:30 - 5. My mom was late. That made me mad. Had a little confrontation in the car. But whatever. With dad for a couple hours. I was expecting him to be in a bad mood but total opposite. Having tons of ideas for kate and i's creation. Nonstop thinking. Headache.

Wednesday
Chem test. No Kate at school, English was a bore without her there. Got home and read "Someone like You" I seriously love Sarah Dessen. She is an amzing author, I hope to even be close to her writing skills. She can jump in the mind of a teenager, so many emotions expressed in her books I have experienced. Her fights between parents and teens are so realistic. And her girl characters always closely resemble my attitude. It is universal.
Eric came home and they lost the game so no more districts. And that is when the shit hit the fan. Eric called dad, dad got mad,mom talked to dad and she riled herself up and of course I stuck up for my dad because I can't help myself. So my mom and I had this confrontation because she said something along the lines of "I had a great father..." and I started crying saying, "I love my dad just the way he is. You have no right to complain. I didn't pick him, and I wouldn't change him." Sure my dad can piss me off more than like anyone, but that is because we are so alike, but I love him more than anyone on earth. So I cried, lost my appetite and only ate a little bit. While watching OTH mom tried to come and talk some and I lashed out saying I wanted the fight to be over. Veronica Mars. Shower. Bed.

Of all the things I believe in
I just want to get it over with
tears from behind my eyes
but I do not cry
Counting the days that past me by

I've been searching deep down in my soul
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old
Looks like I'm starting all over again
The last three years were just pretend and I say

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I love
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

I still get lost in your eyes
And it seems like I can't live a day without you
Closing my eyes till you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light but it's not right

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

Ohhh yeah
It hurts to want everything & nothing at the same time
I want whats yours and I want whats mine
I want you but I'm not giving in this time

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

We the stars fall and I lie awake
Your my shooting star
 
 
Current Mood: confusedconfused
Current Music: Goodbye To You, Michelle Branch
 
 
ocfanatic25
Tuesday
Went to Kate's after school to study for Chem test. Feeling pretty good about the test. Dad's House. Gilmore on tonight and look at this preview for next week, "Jess tells Rory that she inspired him to write a book and the whole thing causes major problems for Rory-Logan. The book that Jess wrote is called 'The Subsect.'" I love Logan but I mean Milo is coming back!!!!

Monday
Model UN meeting at Dondero. Went on second level for first time. Had to introduce myself which is embarassing, I am shy. Went to Lauren's after and hung out there till LeAnn's mom drove me home at 6:40 and rest of the night studied for AP test while watching 7th Heaven adn Related.

Sunday
Complained enough so no church. Stayed in pj's all day and did homework. Had 45 minute phone call with Kate which will probably make my dad happy when the phone bill comes. for my cell. Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy. I screamed "I love George" for like the first five minutes. He is just so cute! And by cute I mean sweet, kind, nice.

Saturday
My mom woke me up at a ridiculously early hour, 8:30, to ask me "How was the show?" I burried my head in my pillow and then she jsut started picking up my clothes off the floor and annoying the hell out of me. So I got her to go away but she showed up like ten minutes later and I had to get up. Crabby for a bit, decided she wanted "Mother/Daughter Shopping Day." Yeah! Not! It wasn't as bad as I expected but it got bad when she kept asking about my dad and Lynn and if they would ever get married. Seriously wanted to rip hger head off. But I got two pairs of J. Crew pants that are like sent from God. They fit perfectly! Sure they are long but I love them. Went to Kate's from 7-11 and hung out with Emily R, Michelle, Billy, Zach, Travis, and my brother. I came over early and we talked and we rented "New Jack City" which was really funny. Like one character uses a little girl as a bullet proof vest. I was laughing my ass off. Went home and again pretty tired.

Friday
Pretty good day. Most of the day spent looking forward to go out at night with everyone. So when I got home got ready for show and went to Lauren's. The show was good and I had a blast. The frist band you could understand but by far my favorite was Pheonix Under Fire, not just because of Ross, but because even though it was a small crowd everyone watching them was really into it. And Ross did really good. We hung out with the band after the show which was fun, Ross gave out hugs and we talked with the band but seriously so much was happening at one time and I wish I could remember all the funny and awesome moments but I can't. It is all a blur. And then we froze our asses off waiting for Michelle's parents to pick us up. We were the last people to leave the place the owner's were even gone, but I had fun because I really didn't want to go home. When I did get home I washed my face and crawled into bed and for the first time in years I fell asleep not long after my head hit the pillow.
The funny thing is looking back on what I just wrote I didn't even mention that I talked to Nick, yep I did, but it wasn't a really big deal to me. I am getting over him. He was doing this head banging to the music that was obviously just for show, because his friends were doing it, and it was something a follower would do, I thought it was really stupid, so I am beginning to really seriously, not even kidding, not liking him anymore.

Thursday
With dad this was our last night with him. Just read fanfic when I got home and sat around. No tests the next day so felt good about that. When dad got home ate dinner and watched Batman Begins which was suprisingly good. Writing short paragraph on mayoral debate that I personally felt was really good.
 
 
Current Mood: calmcalm
Current Music: Crazy Girls, Bethany Joy Lenz
 
 
ocfanatic25
Wednesday
Felt like a Thursday. Good mood. This morning had this brief five minute thing were I was having the claustrophibic feeling, guess why? I was wearing my one of my favorite outfits which made my mood good. Did awesome on Quick Quiz in math and had a pop quiz in econ that I didn't do to well on , but I feel good about the polyatomic quiz. Going pants and shoe shopping tonight. VM and Lost on.

Tuesday
I was super hyper after art. In a good mood pretty much all day. Nick and I had this "moment" as Kate and I classfied it. I know maybe I shouldn't put this info in here because who knows who will see it but like I said all I want is for us to be FRIENDS. Right now we are nothing, like we were never friends. Plus, I am getting over him. I think for me the problem was there was always that "What if..." last year attached to him in my mind. Instead of going over to Kate's after school Lauren, Kate, adn I decided to go to the last JV socer game. We had fun, Lauren didn't like our teasing, they lost 0-3. Bad. Eric practices with varsity starting tomorrow. Polyatomic ion quiz tomorrow and just started studying tonight. Gilmore was good, I just love the show, Emily says it isn't any good anymore but I disagree completely. Watched this Jerry Senfield DVD titled "I'm telling you for the last time." just after the first five minutes my mouth hurt from laughing so hard then by the end my throat actually hurt. It was an hour of nonstop laughter. He was hilarious talking about Halloween, planes, sports, and everything under the sun. I would love to go to a comedy night at some bar when I am in college because it seems like a good way to piss away time, and everyone, incuding me, could use some more laughter in life. Shower(Like you guys care I took a shower). Bed.
 
 
Current Mood: energeticenergetic
Current Music: Because of You, Kelly Clarkson
 
 
ocfanatic25
Monday
In AP getting an A- on report card. So excited! Worried about finishing essay on political platforms in time for Wednesday and need to start studying the polyatomic ions. Oops. I am on overload. Finished economics project but the daycare lady never emailed me so i don't have the state license number. Trying not to worry. Doing Chem Pre-Lab and math hw. New complex problems. Model UN meeting today after school. Tuna Patties for dinner, one of my favorites. 7th Heaven. Ruthie finally admitting feelings for Martin. My dad says tv shows I watch have to much drama and that in life he has enough. I never want to become an adult who can't pick apart a show storyline or doesn't grasp the fact that kids have it hard to, i mean my dad isn't to bad about that stuff but there is a point in between were parents lose touch the old rebellious part of them. My dad says it is because they want to stop you from doing the things they did but with mistakes comes understanding. We need to fall and pick ourselves up and plus what kid wants to do nothing rebellious as a teen they make up the stories you tell for the rest of your life, they may not be the best days but i don't want them to be the worst either. Watched part of Related but mostly doing hw right now. Shower. Thinking about Kate and I's plan and brainstorming a bunch. Lot to do tomorrow I feel.
 
 
Current Mood: stressedstressed
Current Music: Strange and Beautiful (I'll Put A Spell On You), Aqualung